|The (TOTALLY ACCURATE) documentary of Mario|
|Season 3, Episode 41|
|Series||Super Mario 64 Bloopers|
|Air date||Aug 18, 2013|
|Free lunch for Mario||Super Mario 64: The Movie|
|v • t • e|
Timeline of MarioEdit
- 1952: Mario was born somewhere in Italy; unfortunately he was so freaking ugly, his father was terrified and attempted to kill him "before he laid eggs". Instead his parents threw him out of the car on the side of the road and sped off, before crashing and dying (according to Mario himself, he was a sexy girl).
- 1954: Baby Mario was found and taken to a foster home, meeting his lost younger brother Luigi, whom he formed an unbreakable bond with (although Mario threw Luigi out the window once).
- 1965: At 14, Mario and Luigi attend high school. Mario was apparently a star student (he actually set his teacher on fire). He was also popular, but danced naked in the showers, freaking Luigi out.
- 1977: Mario eventually falls in love with Stacy, but later falls in love with spaghetti for the first time (which is when the nightmare began).
- 1981: Mario's reputation hit rock bottom when he was reportedly buying drugs from a Toad dealer in the parking garage. Upon taking these drugs led to horrible consequences. They probably made him absolutely batshit crazy, with footage captured of him violently trashing an office, screeching in incoherent German (although SMG4 states he's apparently acting normal during this). This also led to him doing more stupid or crazy shit, like spooking peers naked in the pool, or dancing on the roof, getting yelled at by the principal.
- 1985: In real life, Nintendo released Super Mario Bros. for the NES.
- 1989: Eventually, under unknown circumstances, Mario ended up burning the whole damn school down (leading the principal to despise him forever). Following that, needless to say, Mario's experience with drugs made him quite a hopeless, crazy wreck of a man.
- 1990: However, managed to get off of drugs and recovered. He eventually found work as a plumber with Luigi. The two attended Plumber Academy for Idiots (although Mario didn't graduate, he still got the job). Mario states he doesn't mind pipes, but hates the fact the people crap in them.
- 1991: Mario eventually got a call from Princess Peach, who invites him to come to her castle, to "clean her shat". Mario arrives at the castle, but ringing the doorbell sets off alarms and sets a Chain Chomp after him.
- 1993: Going into the castle, Mario meets Toad. At first, Toad is happy to meet him (he later states that unfortunately spending years living with Mario and his retarded antics made him the grumpy little weiner he is today). But with no princess in sight, Mario sees a fat Dragon-Koopa named Bowser standing around eating a sandwich. Impatient and frustrated, Mario knocks the sandwich out of Bowser's hands and on the floor. This traumatizes Bowser and causes him to become Mario's nemesis and always kidnap Peach.
- 1995: Mario keeps visiting the castle, much to chagrin of Peach. However, eventually Mario and Luigi form a family of sorts with Peach and Toad.
- 1997: Mario eventually learns of a video game company called Nintendo, who back then were just getting started. They needed a mascot, and Mario, intrigued, decided to volunteer. Appealing to the CEO that kids would like him, the CEO agreed. Thus, Mario became the mascot of Nintendo, and thus millions of video games were made about him and his adventures.
- 2001: SuperMarioGlitchy4 visits the castle, and becomes friends with Mario. Also, all the other YouTube Rangers visit the castle to. Mario starts starring in SMG4's bloopers and becomes even more popular.
- 2002: Rumors spread that Mario was taking drugs again, causing him to become a criminal again. He sells free candy (drugs) and got wasted at bars and disorderly conduct and other illegal shit.
- 2007: This caused him to be fired from Nintendo; losing his lucrative job, Mario becomes a bum, eating spaghetti all the damn time, being a fatasS (in reality, Mario is still working for Nintendo and gets lotsa moneh becuase of his games).
- 2011-onward: He works for SMG4 full time, leading to the bloopers since then.
- Spaghetti: dies
- Mario is only called Mr. Mario in this blooper.
- SuperMarioGlitchy4 voices the narrator. This is one of the first times his voice is heard in his videos.
- This may be a remake of the blooper How Mario was Born.
- This also may be a reference to Superman: Secret Origins, both being yet another take on the origin of Mario and Superman respectively, even after previous stories did the same thing (How Mario was Born and Superman: Birthright).