Mario: La la la hm hm hmm! (cut to a front view of him) La la la hm hmm hm hm hmmm! (A golden Mushroom appears) Ho ho ho! Oh, boy! Finally! Mama mia! (dialogue switches to subtitles) after all those failed attempts...
(Flashback to Mario injecting a Mushroom. It explodes. Switch to another flashback, but this time, the Mushroom turns into a living one from MapleStory.)
Mario: Ah! (he shoots it) Oh.
(Switch to one more flashback, but this time, the Mushroom turns into a Toad.)
Mario: Grrr! Mamaf***er!
(Switch back to Mario in the present day.)
Mario: Ho ho ho! It is time! (in normal, Italian voice; cut to a front view of Mario and the Mushroom, and a bowl of spaghetti) Okie dokie! Wooaooh! (puts Mushroom in spaghetti) Wooh! (Fade-flash to the spaghetti, now in a gold tint) Wooooahahahaa! (cut back to Mario) I just sh*t my pants!
(Cut to Luigi entering the room. He notices Mario and the spaghetti.)
Luigi: Whoa! What is that?!
(Cut to a top view of the room. Mario appears jumping, with golden spaghetti in hand.)
Mario: (in light turquoise text) THE IRRESISTABLE GOLDEN SPAGHETTI! (in normal text) irresistible to any spaghetti lover!
(the ground shakes; Mario and Luigi exclaim and go outside. A part of the sky breaks, revealing Mario Head.)
Mario Head: Hello! It's-a-me, Mario!
(The Bros. freak out. Luigi blows up into a coin)
Mario Head: Have you seen spaghetti? Hm.
(The Mario Bros. run away from Mario Head into Bob-omb Battlefield. Mario is shocked to see Mario Head followed them there.)
Mario Head: Hmm, oh! Nice spaghetti you got here. Can I have it?
(cut to Mario)
(cut back to Mario Head. He is mad.)
Mario Head: (growls in Mario's voice)
Mario: Uh oh!
(An Old Man appears walking in front of Mario.)
Old Man: Nice job, d*ck face!
Mario Head: DIE.
(He sucks EVERYTHING in. First Mario, then Luigi, then the rest of Bob-omb Battlefield. Cut to Mario entering Mario Head's mouth, fade to black. Title shows up accompanied with Mario Party "Explanation Screen" music.)
Mario Head: (burps) Hey, where did everybody go?
(Quick pan that shows a man. He is lying on the ground, accompanied by saxophone music.)
Man: Are you a girl?
(cut to Daisy)
Daisy: Am I a girl?
(cut back to man)
Man: Yes. Are you?
(cut to Daisy again)
(cut to a side view of the two)
Man: MARRY MEEEEEEEEEEE! (Daisy jumps in shock while he says this.)
(shows a Goomba)
Goomba: Sometimes, I crawl under my bed and... (cut to a bed inside Peach's Castle. Goomba is under the bed, wearing a carrot costume) pretend I'm a carrot.
(shows Death Star with heavy breathing. Cut to inside the Death Star. It shows a bakc guy. Pan to reveal Mario.)
Darth Vader: Lugey, I'm a you papa!
Mario: No, you a not my papa.
Darth Vader: Oh yeah, I'm a you papa.
Mario: No, you a not my papa.
Darth Vader: Yes, I'm your papa!
Mario: No, you a not my papa.
Darth Vader: Stop saying I'm not you papy you little Sh*it!
Mario: You're not my papa!
Darth Vader: ALRIGHT, I'LL CUT OFF YOUR HAND!
(Vader cuts off Mario's hand)
Mario: OH! WHY YOU CUT OFF MY HAND-A-PAPA? (cries)
TV: Who is that Pokémon?
Guy: IT'S PIKACHU!
TV: It's Clefairy!
Announcer: And now it's time for Pete the Piranha! And his best friend Jimmy.
Jimmy: Oh hey Pete, what about we go on an adventure? YIPPEEE! So Pete, what do you want to do tomorrow? I don't know, I wanna go to the Ice Cream Shop, I want to go to the park, go fishing, I don't know. So, I don't know, what do you want to do today?
Pete: (cries and coughs) GIVE ME SOME F**KING WATER!
SMG69: Hey, Can I be in your video?
SMG4: (puts on glasses) Not today.
SMG69: PLEASE ADD MEEEEEE!
(The Two go into space, SMG4 throws SMG69 into the sun, it then says Don't be a toad)
Luigi: I'm a Luigi, Number One!
Mario: Hey Luigi! You look like sh*t.
(Luigi boasts a sad face)
(Text card shows "Later...")
(Mario is watching Sonic the derphog: Eggventure (GET IT!?). The TV channel magically changes to static.)
Mario: Hey, what the f*ck?!
(The static changes to Luigi's death stare from DatVoiceGuy (according to this video's description). Mario is shocked.)
Guy: ♪ What's this? ♫
♫ There's white things in the air ♪
♪ What's this? ♫
♫ I can't believe my eyes are- ♪ (gets hit by snowball) WHAT THE F**K?
Narrator: Gurl stops meaking out. She said: Bbz! Will ye luv me 4ever? He said: Nao! Deh gurl cried and ran across deh road, befor deh grean man came on the sien. Boy was crying, and went tu pick up her body. She was ded. He wispered to her corpse: I meant to say: I will luv you....5ever!
SMG4: Dat mean he luv her moar dan 4ever!
(lik if you ;_; everytim)
Waluigi: Guess how much I love you.
Narrator: ...he said.
(Rubber Duck shoots Waluigi)
Rubber Duck: B*tch do I look like I care? NO.
(Moments with steve!)
Steve: HI GUYS!
(Steve makes cars crash)
Steve: Fries, orange soda with extra ice, A large order of fries, barbecued bacon...
(Steve dances with strangers)
Steve: WUUZAAHHHHHH! (Scares somebody)
Steve: Some hot apple pie....large order of fries
(Steve makes cars crash) (Again)
Steve: Hi guys! (Scares other people)
Steve: Fries, Orange soda with no ice
Cashier: OH COME ON ALREADY!
(Music Plays) DROP IT.
(Everybody Dances in the McDonalds)
(Peach dances with Gurl cries eyes)
Narrator: One day in Teletubby land, Po fell out of bed.
(Po falls out of her bed)
Po: Oh, SH*T!
Narrator: She fell down from the table.
Other Tellitubbies: Uh oh!
Po: SHUT THE F**K UP!
Narrator: She fell down from surprise!
Guy: SUPRISE MOTHERF**KA!
(Po screams in Homer Simpson's voice and falls down, and so do the other Teletubbies. The message Don't do drugs or you'll be trippin' ballz appears.)
Justin Bieber: For the first time, and now we're like (Gets beaten up)
Mario: BABY, BABY, BABY, OHHHHHH,
Luigi: BABY, BABY, BABY,
M and L in unison: OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(Tinky Winky spins around, making annoying noises)
Wario Head: Obey, me Wario. I am your master. Mario is your enemy. Don't let Mario get the 6 Golden Coins. DON'T LET MARIO SURPASS. Obey Wario. DESTROY MARIO.
(After watching the video, Waluigi Jumps out the window and freaks out)
Bowser: Wait. (MM says what?) But first, LET ME TAKE A SELFIE. (Bowser then dances to the music.)
(Shows Different SMG4 characters dancing to Slap that a$$.)
(Mario then wakes up)
Mario: What happened? Where am I? Are we dead?
Luigi: You were dreaming and we're in your giant head.
Mario: I swear that head Isn't me! He's ugly!
Mario Head: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUURP. Hey, That was pretty good!
Mario: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
Luigi: I blame you and your stupid spaghetti.
Mario: That's it Luigi! The golden Spaghetti! We can use that! Quick! Help me find It!
Luigi: What if the world is already destroyed?
(Meanwhile in the Mushroom Kingdom....)
(Guy runs away from Mario Head)
Mario: There it is! Power of the golden spaghetti can help us!
Golden Spaghetti: Uh Uh Uh, You just say the magic word!
Mario: Mama F***ER!
Mario: Toad? What do you want?
Toad: I can get you out of here!
Toad: HEY GIANT MARIO HEAD! I ACCIDENTALLY POOPED INSIDE YOUR MOUTH WHEN YOU ATE ME!
Mario Head: Oh my god. (Throws up Mushroom Kingdom, putting everything back in place) YOU MUST DIE!
(Mario throws a bomb in Mario Head's mouth)
Mario Head: Hey, that was pretty good-BOOM!
SMG4: Man, what have you guys done to this place? (finds golden spaghetti) Oh look, free food! (Eats it, and flies into the sky naked).
(Mario and Luigi shares a hi-5)
End of Transcript