“15994, the princess set out to go infiltrate the planet weegee and...then stuff happend aningenhitpjdhipdfjifpjipsdjfdipsdfipsdjfsdpdfspdspfjsdipfsdpfpsdfjsdpfjpjsddfpfsdpfsdjspdjsdpofPANCAKES”
―The opening monologue
It's the year 15994 the princess of...well it doesn't say exactly what her kingdom is in this universe BUT STILL, the princess sets out to infiltrate the "planet weegee", a huge space station under the command of the evil Darth Toad. Darth Toad arrives in the station to find tourists(consisting of the Happy Mask Salesman, Zero ,Chell, Finn the Human, a terrorist, and Tinky Winky) have somehow found their way into the station. After killing HMS (who was the tour guide) the princess is caught, although she manages to distract the guards long enough for R2-D2, carrying a distress message, to flee.
Cut to an unknown planet, where we see Mario dancing naked for money. After failing, he heads to his home.
Back on the Weegee Star, while trying to find a way out, R2 runs into L-3Gi, and the two escape in a pod. They crash land in front of Mario's house, where a damaged R2 displays the message. The next day Mario and L3Gi find that R2 his gone, but they find his tracks. They go out to find him. Eventually, they are attacked by a group of wild Teletubbies. Suddenly, a strange man saves them. The man brings them back to his house, and says his name is Hobo-Wan Kenobo, and that he knew Mario's father. After seeing the princess' message, Hobo says he must train Mario in the ways of the force.
“The space invading continues...mario, hobo and the other peeps now need to somehow save the princess. but how? :o”
―The second act begins
So as expected Mario is totally bombing at being a Jedi. Anyways Hobo ends up running out of live Teletubbies to use as practice dummies, and Mario says he isn't ready to save the princess and that he needs to go back to his farm. Hobo then says the Teletubbies burned down his farm.
Back on the Weegee star, Vader is interrogating the princess, however Peach distracts Vader with a sandwich.
The gang comes to a town in search of a pilot. SMG4 takes them to a gay bar, where he goes to find pilots. Mario, meanwhile, takes some drugs and becomes indistinguishable from the rest of the crowd. After SMG4 plays Baby, Mario has a seizure and the gang takes him to their pilots, Han Yolo and Chewbowsar. Hobo tells them they need to hit the princess' home planet before they can get to the weegee star. Meanwhile outside, R2 and L3Gi run into a trooper then say on the Weegee Star. Mario gets him angry, and the trooper chases them with an RPG. They fly off in the ship, but the trooper shoots a rocket at them. Hobo grabs R2's head and uses it as a deflector shield against the rocket. The rocket bounces back and kills the trooper.
Meanwhile, Vader is getting pretty desperate to get the info Peach has.
The gang arrives at the location of Peach's home planet, but it miraculously has disappeared. They get a transmission from the Weegee Star saying that Vader has destroyed the planet, threatening them if they don't surrender. The transmission then gets highjacked by Robotnik showing off some pretty revealing (and disgusting) Yoga moves.
Mario has a nightmare of Vader trying to persuade him to the dark side with the promise that it has cookies. Mario wakes up to find Vader is spamming the ship's transmission receiver with a repeating annoying time. Han, gone crazy, destroys it and collapses. Suddenly, the ship is struck by a tractor beam and begins to be slowly pulled into the station. Hobo pulls Mario aside and tells him there's only one thing he needs to know, how to use the force. He is about to tell him what to do, but the receiver suddenly sparks back to life as the song, now playing even faster starts blaring. Hobo screams in agony, and Mario takes it as how to use the force. The ship crashes into the landing bay, and the gang finds they are surrounded by troopers, albeit oblivious troopers, but still troopers. They send out a bomb with a mask that somehow fools the troopers into thinking it was one of their own. Suddenly, Steve, for some reason pretending to be a trooper, accidentally kicks the bomb away after his disguise falls apart. The bomb lands near Bowser's stash of bombs, and the landing bay explodes, lighting all the troopers on fire. Vader is informed about it but doesn't seem to care since the trooper's incompetence usually causes their deaths anyway. Meanwhile, the princess, in her cell with an old man in drag, is yelling for help. The old man tells the princess to "use the force", only for the princess to find her cell door had been unlocked the whole time.
The gang splits up, except for R2 and L3Gi, who are told to clean the ship. Mario and Hobo confront Vader, who turns out to be on the toilet. The Princess finds R2 and L3Gi. L3Gi, enthralled by her beauty, runs to her, only for her to completely ignore him and run to R2. Tired of being ignored and abused, L3Gi throws the Princess into the vacuum of space, killing her. Hobo and Vader confront each other and prepare to fight. Vader finds his lightsaber isn't working, only to realize he's holding it the wrong way as it slices into his head. Vader flees and Hobo and Mario give chase. After evading them, Vader starts the station's self-destruct. Hobo tells everyone to get on the ship, and finds that Chewbowsar and Han rescued the old man in drag. As the Weegee Star begins to fall apart, Vader activates forcefields, blocking the gang's escape. As the doors begin to seal, Mario runs off to disable the shields. He gets into the control room and smashes the panels, causing the self destruct countdown to five minutes. Mario is then ambushed by Vader. Vader then decides the two should duel. He gives Mario one last offer to join the dark side, again promising cookies, but this just gets Mario angry. Attacking Mario again, he reveals he is in fact Mario's father....and mother, when in fact he is also revealed to be Toad acting the role of Vader. He then gives Mario and choke hold. Mario remembers the force, still thinking all he needed to do was scream. He does so, and Toad loses control and is struck by his own lightsaber. Mario finds the control room again and disables the shield, and flies off with the gang as the Weegee Star explodes. The Hobo offers to bring the "princess" to Earth, and "she" happily obliges. "She" then takes out a cookie and laughs manically, implying "she" is one with the dark side.
The three-part structure is likely a reference to the original three films of the Star Wars trilogy. The overall story is mainly based on A New Hope, with elements from The Empire Strikes Back thrown into the mix.