|Hey bro. Where's the spaghetti at?|
Not to be confused with John Dimaggio.
- “It's time for Pyramid Puzzle!”
- ―John Gayham
Ever since John Gayham was "a little girl" he had no where to live, then one day he came across the pyramid and loved it like a woman. He claimed that anyone who entered it was doomed and would trick them to play pyramid puzzles and made them die with the help of his henchmen . At the end of Desert Head, he was crushed by SMG4 and X riding a helicopter. He later was revived along with alot of other bad guys in Smg3's plan to destroy Smg4 cause he felt like it, and later appeared in The Wacky Wario Bros.: Money Mayhem in where he robbed a bank with a Goomba, but their money was stolen by Wario and Waluigi who was hiding in the truck's cargo.
- In Desert Head, his last name was spelled "Gayham", however in Smg3's plan to destroy Smg4 because he felt like it, it's re-spelt to "Geyham".
- John Gayham is one of the three minor characters to reappear in a recent Blooper after a long absence, the other ones being Crazy Toilet Dude and The Visitor (Gayham and The Crazy Toilet Dude didn't appear for one and a half year, while The Visitor was away for three years).
- He's dressed exactly like Barbie, the Judge, the Dealer and Bowser's Boss.